I am going to summarize what I hear and learnt from friendship from church camp and reading relationship book on friendship. First of all, there is this model of friendship list from a book called The Relationship Revolution by Nigel D. Polluck.
I was thinking, in this kind of world now, no one would do that kind of thing because it is not the norm. People would think you are crazy and start thinking if gay or lesbian. *shakes head* Such a world.
From my point of view, friendships nowadays are just friends hanging out and helping each other out. I bet there is no such thing as sacrificial love between friends. I mean, if I ask you to die for your friend or friends, would you want to do that?
You do have to be open and honest to your friends. If you are not sure if you can trust the friends you are with, don't open too much. But be honest because they won't like you and you can lose their trust in you if you happen to lie or do something bad to them or even one of them.
There are ways to show your love for your family and friends. You help them out on things, eg buying things for them or just helping out on chores. Anyway, my point is that if you yell at your siblings or parents or disobey them, that doesn't mean you don't love your family or siblings. =)
True friendship can only develop and grow when we work together, trust each other, help each other and rely on each other.
With true friends pointing out your weakness or something bad, I don't think you should keep it at heart and decide that he or she is not a good friend. Instead, you should look at yourself first and try to undo your weakness. Yes, you are not perfect and your friends are not perfect but it would help to study yourself first before start blaming on friends. Not all friends give good advice but some particularly do. Some friends are there to listen to you and give you a long big hug when you are down.
I do admit that I don't like my friends to see me crying if there is anything so I tend to go away or be quiet if I see my friends crying. So don't take it to heart, thinking that your friends desert you when you need someone to talk while you're crying.
- mutual commitment
- sacrificial love
I was thinking, in this kind of world now, no one would do that kind of thing because it is not the norm. People would think you are crazy and start thinking if gay or lesbian. *shakes head* Such a world.
From my point of view, friendships nowadays are just friends hanging out and helping each other out. I bet there is no such thing as sacrificial love between friends. I mean, if I ask you to die for your friend or friends, would you want to do that?
- openness and honesty
You do have to be open and honest to your friends. If you are not sure if you can trust the friends you are with, don't open too much. But be honest because they won't like you and you can lose their trust in you if you happen to lie or do something bad to them or even one of them.
- service
There are ways to show your love for your family and friends. You help them out on things, eg buying things for them or just helping out on chores. Anyway, my point is that if you yell at your siblings or parents or disobey them, that doesn't mean you don't love your family or siblings. =)
- God - centreness
- interdependence
True friendship can only develop and grow when we work together, trust each other, help each other and rely on each other.
With true friends pointing out your weakness or something bad, I don't think you should keep it at heart and decide that he or she is not a good friend. Instead, you should look at yourself first and try to undo your weakness. Yes, you are not perfect and your friends are not perfect but it would help to study yourself first before start blaming on friends. Not all friends give good advice but some particularly do. Some friends are there to listen to you and give you a long big hug when you are down.
I do admit that I don't like my friends to see me crying if there is anything so I tend to go away or be quiet if I see my friends crying. So don't take it to heart, thinking that your friends desert you when you need someone to talk while you're crying.
- willing to let go
Am I being too straight-forward? Hmm.. this is just my point of view. I will let you have your opinions, I won't judge or be defensive. I am beginning to refer to Bible verses a lot. =)
This is from church camp talks and I summarized it up. Some may be the same from what I said above.
- Friends do point out your mistakes or your differences. But how do you feel from it? Embarrassed or anger? If embarrassed, would you rather strangers telling you those or your friends? If anger, study yourself first before you start blaming your friends. Humans aren't perfect so your friends are there to tell you your differences. Again, would you rather strangers telling you?
- Friends don't just give advices or comfort you, they go through each step with you. They are there to guide you so don't keep them away. Remember that some friends deal with their problems better than you.
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